Xandartha
Planet of Mirth, 5 galaxies over.
Welcome to Xandartha, enter at your own risk. If you enjoy logic, this sphere may be hazardous to your health. If you are swift to listen, slow to talk, and slow to anger, or even trying to be one of those things, we welcome you.
Step aboard the Crono Shuttle, being careful not to step on the monkey radios, and enter a place foreign to man, now made available by your Imagination.
Xandartha is not a very old planet, but then it is hard to tell, it takes 150 human years to make ONE Xandarthian season. The natives call themselves Xandarks with great pride. Theirs is a planet dedicated to thought and philosophy, even if your thoughts do not make sense, they are considered in the broad minds of the Xandarks, who realize that life does not have to make sense to be enjoyable. Fashion is casual, with the idea that the clothes should not hinder the mind. Please leave your shoes at the station, you will be provided with soft slippers more suitable to Xandarhta's terrain.
You are greeted by Darca Darco, who is very pleased to be your host while you stay. Please do NOT stare at the extra terrestrials, they try so hard not to stare at you. You will now be presented with the weekly Xandarthian Times. Enjoy your stay.
Xandartha
Times
Your weekly source of
enlightenment
Scientists Discover Hidden Time Zone
by Cyn Cerity
According to Xandartha's top scientists, Planet Earth has a time zone they are totally unaware of. The Xandartha Culture Center humored scientist Coban Torba long enough for him to show them that there is a select spot on Earth which differs from it's proven time zone.
The lecture lasted twenty minutes and no one was seriously injuried. Torba and his associates believe that a small section on the American continient, centered around the state of Virginia, where time actually moves slower then time found elsewhere. "It's hard to pinpoint the exact location," says Torba, "but we believe this 'bubble' of time is located near the border line of counties Amherst and Nelson."
Torba says further studies will follow.
What do Xandarks want for Christmas?
"A zippo charged VX-77 speeder bike!" -Shoutsa Lyttlebouy
"World peace. Oh wait, we have that..." -Silli Mi
"A nice earth boy and a handful of mistletoe." Winksa Gurl
"New shoes. Mine smell like fish." Ihava Stengymum
The Editor's View
Remember you can still send your letters to the editor at the address below!
As a christmas gift to everyone, the editor declines to comment. Happy Holidays from the print shop man who will soon be fired.
Do you have a question for our editor? Maybe you disagree with something happening in Xandartha. Do you have an opinion? If so, write to [email protected] please include the word "editor" in the subject, letters not containing this will be deleted.
Thank
you for visiting Xandartha
Please come again in
better health